My sad lonely blog has been thoroughly neglected. I’m sorry, blog. How will I have all these posts bound into a book for posterity if I never write? We’ve been busy and Claire is so wild I spend most of my days trying to catch her. Which brings me to the latest Fresh List. Or Bae List? Did you know bae is a new word all the teenagers are saying? It’s an odd combination of letters that appears phonetically incorrect to me, but supposedly “bae” means “before anything else.” I’m not cool enough to say it, and you probably aren’t either, so let’s just stick with fresh, Mennonite-style, for today. If you do have a nice use of bae we can all start incorporating, please comment. Last time I posted a Fresh List, my brother-in-law informed me that some people ok, one person are actually saying “obvi” as a short form of “obviously.” I use the word obviously a lot, so I can really get into this. Note: my brother in law is over 30, from a small town, and most of his friends are farmers, so consider the source.
Anyway, here’s my list of things I MUST tell everyone because they are so cool. Well, cool for moms and people my age, obvi.
Claire’s Uglywhere Chair
The other day, I went online to order one of those Pottery Barn “Anywhere Chairs” for Claire. Some of our friends have these and she absolutely loves them, and really, chairs of all kinds, including Adirondack and bean bags. Must be a phase. So I thought, this precious girl doesn’t really have any toys of her own, and nothing pink, poor thing, so I’ll get her a giant pink girly chair with her name on it. I make it to the check-out screen for Pottery Barn and notice two important details: 1) shipping and handling is $30, and 2) the total cost of this monogrammed kid chair is more than I spent on our recliner. I just can’t do it. On principle, I can’t spend her college fund on a cute piece of foam. With a tear in my eye, I X-ed out of the Pottery Barn screen and mourned the fact that my daughter will just have to sit on an adult-size sofa.
Tiny dreams were shattered.
But wait! My best friend Kins lamented the Pottery Barn prices with me, and sent me to a top-secret website, www.UglySofa.com. It is my duty to tell you: we got this for half the price of Pottery Barn, it’s the same chair as far as Claire and I can tell, and it was shipped and delivered in 4 days. I’ve never seen a kid love something so much. You’re welcome, frugal moms.
She deserves it.
Let’s take a Geeky Detour from our regular blog conversation, shall we? Number 2 and 3 today are Must-Have Apps, get to downloading.
If you’re an Instagrammer and you want those pictures printed out with absolutely no effort, go to the App Store, download the free Chatbooks app, sign up with your Instagram account, and subscribe. Every 60 images you post to Insta, you’ll receive a little album in the mail of the printed photos, including date, caption, and hashtags you posted. The pics are square, larger than if you ordered 4x6s, and pretty good quality. It’s $6 per album, and they charge you when they ship (automatically, every 60 posts). It’s like a miracle! And really makes me want to improve my sporadic everyfewweeks posting habits. Perfect for moms with multiple kids who only filled out a baby book for the oldest – compensate with thousands of Insta posts of your middle child! (Thanks to my friend Kali for enlightening me to this app.)
You can follow @chatbooks on Instagram for more info. I should be paid for this endorsement.
Here’s another app I’m super obsessed with this summer. I mean, literally, everywhere we go, we Magisto. This is a hipster movie-editing app that takes video footage and still pics from the Camera Roll on your smartphone, adds effects, music, and a theme, and creates a mini-movie that makes all of your pathetic iPhone filming look like Oscar material. Vintage home videos, instantly! The app is free to upload 10 pics and a few video clips, but I paid $18 to upgrade to Premium for a year, which is super cool and the only money I’ve ever spent on an app. Basically, this app takes a regular day in your life and makes it look like you had the best. time. ever.
There are so many cool features once you get into it, but I have a couple tips, since I know you’re really downloading it rightthissecond. First, take SHORT video clips, like 8-10 seconds. Magisto edits automatically, so it takes the action it thinks you want from the clip. The less action it has to choose from, the more likely it is to include the piece you wanted. Second, not all of your audio will make it to the final cut, so if you really want something, video a clear close-up shot of the speaker you’re filming. You’ll see once you get into it. Every video has its own link, which you can text or email to all your fans. Here’s our day at the river with Kins and her family. It really WAS the best day ever, and Magisto is here to prove it!
http://magis.to/ez4tAUBAA1kzLiEHDmEwCXh2 – one of my movies
Just click the link to experience the magic of Magisto.
And another fresh addition to your life: read this book!
Love Does, by Bob Goff
Here’s an entertaining, inspirational book by some guy I’d never heard of who has a piece of advice for us: Do fun things out of love. It’s available here on Kindle and is a short read that might make you want to start a school in Uganda. Or just take a cake to your local teacher’s lounge, whatever. Guys will like this book, too, since it’s written by a man and all, and it’s a Christian book. God is love, people.
Number 5 today is something SO FRESH we can’t believe it: RAIN
Since May 27, we’ve had 10.6” of rain at our house. God also provides rain, people. And the thing I love most about rain in the desert: the sky turns blue. Normally, the sky here is white with a bluish-tint. Or brown. Or tan. Or black, at night. But after it rains, the air clears, clouds puff up, and the sky is bright blue. If you live somewhere the sky is blue every day, go out and appreciate it. Also there was a mountain lion spotted in our neighbor’s corn field last week, which has nothing to do with blue skies but you should know the dangers we face here.
Check out the blueness.
Same spot, before the 10 inches.
And the last item on my List today:
This kid at a ranch rodeo.
How cool is a mini cowboy on the fence watching his dad, granddad, uncle, and two cousins? That’s so bae.
Go forth and be fresh.